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2022 RESOLUTIONS

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Horoscope by Santos

HOROSCOPE BY SANTOS

Which Saint are you according to your sign?

Aries

RAPHAEL


– “Vivir así es morir de amor” You can’t get any more intense than that.
– Attention seeking is the name of your game.
– You are a multifaceted and spirited person who keeps giving concerts at 80.

Libra

BOY GEORGE


– They will try everything, once in a lifetime.
“Self-definition is self- limitation.” The favourite phrase of every Libra.
– They love it all… performing, costumes, being a British, gay, gender-fluid icon.

Taurus

SADE


– They’re quiet, but they always get what they want.
– They’re good at making great songs without much fanfare.
– You’ll never see a Taurus screaming (unless they don’t get their way).

Scorpio

NICO


– They’ll accuse you of being the rotten apple in the coolest underground band of all time.
– They like to have a glass of wine with you backstage while planning to destroy you.
– They plan world domination while wearing a turtleneck jumper and beret.

Gemini

GRACE JONES


– One day they’re going out with Tony Pike and the next they’ve become a Bond girl.
– You never know what to expect from them, and that’s their best asset.
– They’ll bend over backwards for you once you’re in their circle of trust.

Sagittarius

ERIC CLAPTON


– He seems like a real gentleman but is capable of stealing his best friend’s girlfriend.
– Prone to giving up one vice and getting caught up in another.
– Dedicated to their art, as befitting one of the best guitarists ever.

Cancer

ROGER WATERS


– They’re a bit insecure, and they don’t like being compared to former band members.
– They can’t stop creating.
– They prefer looking back than looking forward.

Capricorn

 NOEL GALLAGHER


– They don’t have a band with their brother, they have a business, and their brother is their employee.
– They think they’re superior to everyone else.
– They like their humour black.

Leo

JOAN JETT


– Prone to going on a wild night out in Ibiza out and getting married to the first person they meet.
– “Here I am” and “This Is What You Get.” Two of Leo’s favourite mantras.
– They are the only protagonist on stage.

Aquarius

BOB MARLEY


– From weed smoker to a reggae legend.
– “Don’t worry, be happy” is the motto of every Aquarius.
– When travelling, they prefer to rest in their hotel than go out and party.

Virgo

KYLIE MINOGUE


– Femininity in the flesh
– They’re always surrounded by the planet’s most beautiful creatures but are completely down-to-earth at the same time.
– They wear breathtaking outfits that will never fit you.

Pisces

MOBY


– They’re nice and uncomplicated.
– They only call someone out when the occasion deserves it, like condemning homophobic or misogynist lyrics.
– They’d prefer to open your own YouTube channel rather than bow down to the record industry.

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